File:Beginner's Guide To Being A Bitch Hermit.png

Episode Number


Cast (in order of appearance): {{Film|Character}}


{{PG-13/R/NC-17}} (A black background with the words 'A Beginner's Guide To Being A Bitch Hermit. Nine Easy Ways to Avoid Society. Pops up as spoken.)

Foamy: A Beginner's Guide to Being A Bitch Hermit. Nine Easy Ways to Avoid Society.

One: Work at home by selling junk on E-bay and mailing stuff from home.

Germaine: Where's the fucking packing tape?

Foamy: Two: Make sure the 56 K internet modem is on 24/7 so no one can get through on the phone.

Pillz-E: I never get the calls anymore from my doctors!

Foamy: Number Three: Go outside no earlier than 3 A.M. Normal people seem to sleep at this time.

Germaine: It's just you and I, Mr. Moonlight.

Foamy: Number Four, keep up with the latest news and technology using the internet.

Germaine: Auto-car?

Foamy: Number Five: Sleep during the day. (Germaine hisses)

Foamy: Number Six: Live on sugary junk food.

Germaine: Mmmm, sugary goodness in my veins!

Foamy: Number Seven seven seven...(Fades out) Listen to Morriesy, and The Smiths, and realize that the world is a bleak place to live.

Germaine: (sadly) Yeah, what difference does it make?

Foamy: Number Eight: Watch T.V. and complain about current Saturday Night Live shows.

Germaine: You...suck.

Foamy: Number Nine: Survive on stuff that was sent to you from Mail-order.

Germaine: Oooh, comic books!

Foamy: (Black background again) This message has been brought to you by: The Foamilian Cult Campaign to Keep Annoying Motherfuckers in the house.

{The Ending screen appears.}

Foamy: Stay inside!

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